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People who borrow... - luvnit - 04-06-2010
A lot of neighbors borrow things from me knowing that I probably have it in my kitchen. Usually it's just seasonings, sugar, butter, eggs, etc. But sometimes someone will ask to borrow small items like a pie plate, muffin tin, rolling pin.
I have one neighbor who will ask for stuff all the time. It's really starting to get to me. She has asked to borrow my food processor and pasta maker. She is a disaster in the kitchen and I am always afraid my item will not be returned in the same shape it was when I gave it to her.
A week ago she wanted a pie plate to make a pot pie for her family. I told her she could make a pot pie in a regular casserole dish and that it would turn out just great. Whew! Averted that one.
Then a few days later she wanted our martini shaker. I reluctantly gave that to her (what harm could come to that?) The same day, while I was in the shower, she sent her daughter over to get a 'lemon squeezer'. My husband answered the door and handed it over.
I don't know what made me so mad about it, but I was ticked off. I said to my hubby, "A lemon sqeezer? Hasn't she ever heard of using her HAND!?" Oh for Pete's sake, that's what I used to do. I think part of what ticked me off was that she was having a 'Pampered Chef' party and they sell lemon squeezers, So what did she need MINE for?
Well that was almost a week ago and they haven't been returned yet.
What do you all do when people ask to borrow kitchen items? Do you just let your possessions go? Or do you have some gracious way to decline? How long do you let them keep the item before you ask for it to be returned?
Do I just have 'SUCKER' stamped on my forhead!
Re: People who borrow... - HomeCulinarian - 04-06-2010
Whoa, Laura... I don't have that problem. But, I say you need to stop loaning your stuff to this neighbor. I'm thinking you could just be needing whatever she wants that day.... so sorry!
One of my daughter's friend's mother wanted to borrow my CAH magazine. I wouldn't let her have the issue, but made a copy for her instead. She was offended, but got over it.
Re: People who borrow... - labradors - 04-06-2010
Maybe you should require a deposit, first.
The Emily Post website had this to say:
Quote:
The Four Cardinal Rules of Borrowing
It’s a good idea to keep track of anything you lend out. My friend Margot has a “borrowing book.” Whether the loan is clothing, books, or money, she writes down everything: who borrows the item, what item is borrowed, and when it will be returned. Maybe this strikes you as overkill, but after a friend borrowed Margot’s favorite dress and $50 to pay bills—neither of which Margot saw again—she decided to keep track of who got what and when. “I don’t mind lending stuff out,” she says. “I just want to make sure I get it back.”
- Discuss what is off-limits or freely usable.
- Don’t borrow without asking.
- You are responsible for what you borrow.
- Don’t lend out items you really care about.
Re: People who borrow... - cjs - 04-06-2010
Wow, I've never been in that position. I can't imagine what I would say or do. And, I can't even picture a person with so much gall as to even ask for some of the things she has.
Laura, you just have 'nice person' tatooed on your forehead, but maybe you ought to add '...until now!'
Re: People who borrow... - Gourmet_Mom - 04-06-2010
I've never had this problem either. I agree with the idea of telling her you need that item. Maybe after a couple of times, she'll take the hint.
Re: People who borrow... - luvnit - 04-06-2010
I guess I have to think faster on my feet. I am usually so caught off guard. In the past I have thwarted some of her attempts to borrow expensive items. My husband grew tired of her borrowing food items and said, "I'm not her grocery store!" Of course he said it to me, he's very brave when not confronted face-to-face. Now when she attempts to borrow food, I tell her, "I'm out of that." "Oh I have to get to the store too." I have even gone so far as to rifle around in my freezer for an 'imaginary' stick of butter and tell her, "Oh, I guess we are out."
Like I said, I am at my wits end with her borrowing stuff. Under normal circumstances I wouldn't mind. However one day, she asked to borrow a cup of olive oil. I really was out and said so. But after I hung up I thought, geez olive oil is so expensive! What the ____ does she need a cup for!
When my hubby came home, he had a 'conspiracy theory' about it. He thinks she must 'borrow' from all the neighbors and stocks up. Then doesn't need to grocery shop. Seems like a lot of trouble to go through to save on the grocery bill. But sometimes people can be strange.
Re: People who borrow... - Mare749 - 04-06-2010
I had that happen to me a few times when I was living in my old neighborhood. The next door neighbor would send his daughter over to borrow stuff from me. After I said no a few times, they got the hint and stopped. One time when she came over and asked for ketchup, I said, "Oh, I don't have any, but when you go to the store, would you ask your dad to pick some up for me?" They never asked again.
I don't think any of us would mind if it was only occasionally, but when people start taking advantage, there is only one thing to do.
Sure wish I was your neighbor, Laura. It would be lots of fun borrowing all that cool stuff you have! (just kidding)
Good luck with Mrs. Mooch.
Re: People who borrow... - labradors - 04-06-2010
Quote:
What the ____ does she need a cup for!
About a month.
Re: People who borrow... - luvnit - 04-06-2010
Quote:
I said, "Oh, I don't have any, but when you go to the store, would you ask your dad to pick some up for me?" They never asked again.
Maryann, LOL! I wish I would have thought of that.
Rob - You are too funny. And probably right!
Re: People who borrow... - pjcooks - 04-06-2010
I very rarely have anyone ask for ingredients. With a Super Walmart 2 minutes from my door, that would obviously be mooching!
But equipment-yes, people ask and borrow. Sometimes for so long, I just go buy a new whatever. But eventually they all return what they borrow. Which explains why I have 12 half sheet pans, 3 coffee grinders, 3coffee pots (????do you really need to borrow a coffee maker??) 2 flat griddle pans, 2 4 slice toasters...another??? and probably 6 alarm clocks.
I always feel I should help out because I have so much, especially after all that borrowing. And after I have written off the items and purchased replacements and then they return the original.
Maybe I should have a yard sale and invite these borrowers exclusively
Good luck
PJ